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In my last newsletter I started by saying, "Life can be
unpredictable." and ended with, "Let the
adventure begin." Well, I have to admit,
it isn't that easy. Starting over -- on
every level -- is far more of a
challenge that I had anticipated.
I'm learning (again) that transition is a process. In our
highly technical "quick fix" culture we
don't always appreciate the nature of
process. It reminds me of that prayer,
"God please grant me patience... Oh, and
I'll need it right now."
Someone recommended a book that has been helpful,
Finding Yourself in Transition
by Robert Brumet.
Brumet talks about the deep and radical changes that are
occurring around us and within us. Some
of our basic assumptions of life are
being challenged.
It's certainly been true in my life. One of my assumptions
was that I could pull up roots and move
everything in my life and simply unpack
and go on as usual. Not so. Much to my
dismay I find that I feel disoriented
and unsettled much of the time.
I woke up one morning feeling very anxious. So much that I
finally used the tools to ground and
center myself that I teach to my
clients. That, and a good 30 minutes of
hypnosis, calmed me down.
But life isn't the same here. Well, maybe life is, but I'm
not. I can see how different it is
outside myself very easily. For example,
my 18 pound alpha male cat who used to
demand to go outdoors every night is now
quite happy, and insistent, to sit in my
lap every chance he gets. He hasn't
asked to leave the house once in two
months. He's quite a different animal
here.
I'm sure that I'm a different "animal" here, as well. But
harder to identify since I can't be a
detached observer. I think that I can be
whomever I want to be here. It's a
process and -- most days -- I'm willing
to let the new me unfold.
Brumet says that we must trust the divine order within the
process. Okay, I'll sit with it and
trust. And some days I'll forget to
trust but then I'm remember and let go
of my personal will again. I don't know
where this is going, but I'll keep you
posted. I don't think I'm alone in this,
am I? |
